the promised land

31 07 2006

I’m off the the promised land today. Just a flying visit, but soon, very soon it will be home.

There are three lovely, small bookstores there and two usually have fantastic sales bins out front. That’s how I got a whole bunch of Lemony Snickets and found some other gems that I might never have come across. Of course, if I buy anything today, it will just be more to move. I’ve already had several complaints about the number and weight of my book boxes. Maybe I could just knock on the door of the new house and ask to leave them in a corner, out of the way…

Perhaps not.

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my “to read” bookshelf

30 07 2006

Tempest-TostI just finished reading Roberston Davies Tempest-Tost. It has been on my shelf for some time, a used copy that I picked up somewhere downtown a long time ago, and like all of the other books that live in my “to read” bookshelp it has proved disapppointing. It was a struggle to get through it, the reading dragging on over weeks rather than days.

Perhaps I was not in the mood for this type of book. Reading the back again, it seemed a good summer read, particularly the theatrical element of it, but maybe I’ve spent too much time for the past few months around amateur theatrical people. The answer’s probably simplier than that though and not confined to simply Robertson Davies’ prose.

I have a whole bookshelf of books I’ve accumlated and not read yet. It’s a bit embarassing and excessive that I have not just one shelf, but rather a whole bookcase of books that I haven’t read yet. It started during undergrad. I would buy books or be given them and then not have the luxury of reading them. It seems I buy the most books when I don’t have the time to read them – mainly when I’m in school and I have to read what I was told to read. I suppose it was me rebelling a bit buying these books, making it clear that one day I would read what I wanted.

What has happened with book after book is just disappointment. They can’t seem to live up to the promise they hold sitting on the bookshelf. It’s the ones that I always most look forward to that prove the most disappointing. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time was the first one. Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell I’ve put down and taken back up countless times, but I still can’t seem to get through it. The Lovely Bones still sits on my shelf unread because I’m terrified of the same thing happening.

Other books – ones that I never expected much from – are the ones that have surprised me. It my awhile to get into The Dress Lodger but it took an emotional turn that really surprised me. The Sweetest Thing I also enjoyed more than I was expecting to.

What I want to do right now is return to some of my old, comfortable books. My Jane Austens and my Agatha Christies and my Rosamund Pilchers (particularly The Shell Seekers and September), but I can’t because they’re all packed and by the time they are unpacked school will have begun again and then it’s the same vicious cycle starting again.





time

29 07 2006

b000065cxp01_ss500_sclzzzzzzz_v1116132515_.jpg I’ve been listening obsessively to The Last Five Years. Saw it on stage a couple of weeks ago and while I was overwhelmed by the production, I did love the music and the lyrics, particularly “The Schmuel Song.”

It’s the whole idea of time. Time has been on my mind, probably since leaving the PhD. Wasted time. The end of time. It’s all that I’ve been thinking about for close to two years. That’s a long time to obsess about those sorts of things.

I keep waiting for more time. I waste time thinking about when I’ll have more time.

What a waste of time that is.





a new beginning

29 07 2006

so I’ve failed again. part of it was the technology aspect. i didn’t want to pay for a .Mac membership and I got frustrated with the publishing aspect of iWeb even though it made such a pretty and cool website.
excuses, excuses….
big changes right now. the (first) move is just a week away. school starts in just over a month. exciting…scary too.

i’m going to archive the old posts just because… I suppose if they follow me around long enough I’ll have enough motivation to update more regularly.

April 30, 2006

i was looking through some older photographs for a new desktop picture and i came across this one from Bath.
for some reason it got me thinking about different places.
i loved Bath – except for the actual Baths. it was a place though that Jane Austen was not overly fond. somehow that lead me to think about places – about places we like, places we dislike, places we feel comfortable, places we feel unsafe and realizing that some of that – perhaps a lot of that – has to do with what occurs in certain places.
for example, i hate the city i live in right now. yes, i feel unsafe here. even though it is comfortable suburban space, there seems a potential for chaos and trouble that is hard to explain to anyone else. but i think i hate this place even more because i can think of nothing good that has come of living here. all i can remember are the awful things that have occurred since moving here. in my head this makes sense. in my head i think about how difficult things have been since moving here. yes, in my rationale mind, i know that these could and probably would have occurred no matter where i was living. and yet still to me this place = a bad place.
good thing i’m moving soon isn’t it?